swabbies

[XPatriot]

MULLING OVER THE SWAB SQUAD

 

Duff Beer is the brew favoured by Homer Simpson, which he drinks at home on the couch as a fun way of passing time. Curiously, the director of research at the Australian Drug Foundation is a man named Duff - Dr Cameron Duff - who kind of declared this week that drugs, notably party drugs, are the new beer.

 

"Drug use seems to have become a leisure activity in its own right," he said, citing a foundation survey of 380 peppy Melbourne nightclubbers.

 

In short, pillin' and chillin' are now "mainstream".

 

Dr Duff made a careful call for national policy makers to "rethink" their approach to managing the heartland's latest hobby.

 

His comments made news, but inspired no outrage.

 

Consider, on Friday night a real-life Edna Everage called Radio National talkback to say that expelling school students found smoking weed wouldn't deter other students from bonging on.

 

"Kids smoke marijuana," she said. "It's just a fact of life."

 

She could well have been talking about the quality of lamingtons at a church fete, such was her shrugging tone.

 

Certainly, John Howard isn't slapping his forehead with amazement and a Homer-like, "Doh!" But the random drug testing by Victoria Police of 9000 motorists over the next 12 months might do it.

 

The world-first experiment begins in four days - at least that's when the police officially get their powers to conduct the testing. The first roadside swabbing is actually some weeks away; the technology isn't in the hands of the police yet.

 

The sampling of drivers won't give us a definitive picture of Australia as a stoner nation - yet it promises to make a compelling one.

 

When the drug test kits turn up, and if they hold up, we'll know if drug-driving exceeds drink-driving's popularity. More fatal accidents involve drugs than drink - and drink-driving is very popular indeed. Consider the recent blitz on the West Gate Bridge: a boozer at the wheel caught every four minutes.

 

She could well have been talking about the quality of lamingtons at a church fete, such was her shrugging tone.

 

During the drug trial, drivers will be tested for cannabis and speed - and not the full range of popular party favourites, including the top whiz, ecstasy. It's presumed that a good number of E-users will be nabbed, because speed is widely used to cut the huggy drug - one bound to invisibly confuse the trial's analysis and resulting profile.

 

Also confused are the subscribers to marijuana com. A newspaper story about the drug test trail was posted on the site last month, birthing a discussion board featuring many people with dope-related nicknames - some outraged about their bodies being invaded ( by the swab ), but many more of a mellow disposition who considered the police campaign a reasonable idea.

 

Bongwater writes: "Yeah, I'm for it if it can show recent traces, like within the last four hours. But if it can't tell when you used a drug, then it is ridiculous and shouldn't be allowed." Smoking Joe Lee, likewise: "I don't like the idea of anyone driving while intoxicated but... when testing for alcohol, there is an agreed-upon level that says, 'You're wasted!' Will the swab system work in a similar way?"

 

Put your dreamy minds at ease, fellas. I called George Svigos, media adviser to Police Minister Andre Haermeyer. George says the swabs will pick up the good stuff within two to three hours of smoking it.

 

A helpful tip: stock up on munchies before twisting up. No more late night dashes to the 7-Eleven.

MAP posted-by: Richard Lake

[boomstix]

more revenue raising

this is just tax or roadside piracy

if you really want to prevent it then provide a solution

 

i liked the tip, or you could try walking if its inside an hours walk or two

its really not that bad a way to get there, keeps you warm

i am not a big fan of cars, i think they waste a lot of energy

in a way i can't wait for the oil to run out so we can all breathe again and have some shady trees around

 

i know country cats like them, but why do you need to drive yourself in the city?

couldn't there just be another way to go that we haven't tried hard enough at yet?

i guess i'm a stoned hippy